Exploring New Horizons With A Grateful Heart

Posted on Wednesday, June 30, 2010 | 0 comments

It was a rainy Monday afternoon and I was going through my usual Twitter and Facebook routines when my phone rang. The next thing I knew? I was panicky seeing Mr. Kayam's name blinking with the lights on my phone display. He's the guy from HR, as in Human Resources Department of Makati Medical Center (MMC). So I hurriedly went out of the house to take the call thinking that if I'd take the call inside, some extraterrestrial life will intercept my phone's network signal.

"Hi Sir!" the tone of my voice was very confident. I knew it, they'd call me.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Euraoba. We are happy to inform you that this coming Monday will be your first day at the Nuclear Medicine Department of Makati Medical Center."

If you saw how I reacted on such happy news? You'd smile on the deep emotion caused by the sight of something extraordinary. I screamed and laughed my heart out. Linda, my cousin's Personal Assistant, was shocked. She wanted to put masking tape on my mouth. I was acting that way for almost two hours and I got dressed in my I-don't-care-what-other-people-think-about-me-because-I'm-just-friggin-happy-today attitude.

The moment my euphoria subsided, I was back in the arms of this loving world and it brought me to a dreamy state again. I wanted to poke myself but I never dared burst my own bubble until anxiety seeped in.

Why should I be anxious anyway? WHY? The fact that it is an unfamiliar area and I have never worked in that part of the hospital is making me anxious. Indeed I was anxious but there was this strong feeling that I am so gonna conquer this area and like the first man on the moon - I brought my flag with my name in it and I am going to nail it on the job description.

The moment I announced that I was going to become the FIRST and ONLY Nuclear Medicine Nurse of Makati Medical Center, a lot of my friends expressed their happiness and delight by posting well-wishes on the shout-out that I wrote on Facebook. I was ecstatic again and I felt blissful but the feeling of being in the "unknown" kept coming back.

Now, I have a big question written on my forehead and it says, "What are the roles of a nuclear medicine nurse?"

Good thing Google has it all!!! Pooof!!! And allow me to warn you, it can be very complex.

According to ISPUB The Internet Journal of Nuclear Medicine, the responsibilities of the nurses in nuclear medicine are highly variable, ranging from administering intravenous radioisotopes to non radioactive medications.

It is also the responsibility of the nuclear medicine nurse to monitor the patients for any adverse reactions during or immediately after the administration of radioactive and non radioactive materials to the patients. Nurses can answer the patient's questions regarding the medications. The nurses can also assist the technologists to asses the mental and physical status of the patients before the administration of the radiopharmaceutical.

Nurses with proper radiation safety training can also counsel patients, staff members and families with children regarding radiation effects on pregnancy and breast feeding.

Nurses are essential during daily nuclear medicine procedures. Not only do they help in multiple tasks, they are critical in taking care especially of oncology, pediatric, cardiac and neurology patients. Nurses with experience in oncological problems can better explain the new technological advancements in the diagnosis and treatment of patients including PET scanning and Radio immunotherapy and help patients to make the proper decisions. Nurses who deal with children make them more comfortable to undergo difficult nuclear medicine procedures without the need for sedation in most cases. During the complicated ictal Single photon emission computed tomography (SPECT) imaging of the Seizure patients, nurses contribute enormously to prevent the patient from hurting himself and at the same time help to have a good quality images without motion occurring during imaging. Knowledge of various nuclear medicine procedures including Dual- energy x-ray absorptiometry (DEXA) scan can help the nurses to aid the patients with osteoporosis to undergo the procedure smoothly.

During PET/CT imaging, the tasks of nurses include monitoring blood glucose and adverse reactions to iodine contrast.

See? Who said being a Nuclear Medicine Nurse is an easy job. I know it takes quite some time before I become too familiar with my new role. Dale Carnegie, an American writer and lecturer, once said, "Don't be afraid to give your best to what seemingly are small jobs. Every time you conquer one it makes you that much stronger. If you do the little jobs well, the big ones will tend to take care of themselves."

I will forever be thankful to God for being such a gracious provider. He has given me endless opportunities albeit all the other chances that I blew. I may not have prayed hard but God wrote his gospel not in the Bible alone, but on trees and flowers and clouds and stars and even on opportunities.

And thus, I'm grateful - a grateful first and only Nuclear Medicine Nurse of Makati Medical Center.



♥--> I was laughing at myself while writing this post. Thanks to everyone who congratulated me. I am so excited. Wohoooo!!! <--♥

Until When

Posted on Friday, June 25, 2010 | 0 comments
McVee was too bored at home and he needed a dose of McSt. So he sent a message to McSt that says, "I don't know if it is still a good idea to see you but I think there are still a lot of things that we need to discuss."

McSt replied and said, "I think so too and I have to make bawi for the emotional turmoil I caused you."

"I'm free tomorrow. We can talk about us over coffee." McVee was smiling while texting.

The next day McVee was very excited. Looking at his face, he was all smiles from ear to ear. He hurriedly went out of the house and told everybody at home that he's going to do something about his license at PRC. But we all know the truth, he is going to meet up with McSt at Starbucks.

McSt was already sipping his Caramel Frapuccino when McVee arrived. McSt's eyes looked tired since he was on the night shift while McVee looked dashing because he slept with a happy heart after receiving the confirmation that both of them are meeting up the next day.

"Hi! You're late, as always." said McSt.

Mcvee smiled and said, "GOSH!!! Traffic was bad and I had to cross the street because the overpass was too far and I did not feel the urge to follow pedestrian rules."

After a series of conversations about other people, McVee tried his luck on opening his issues with McSt. Of course, McVee was very hesitant but he did not see the point of not talking about their own issues.

"I see you're very happy with your new love. But I just wanna know what happened to us. You caught me off-guard by bringing your new love to the party." Mcvee was smiling while flipping his phone pretending that what he just said did not affect him.

"McVee, I realized that I was too patient with you and because of that you took me for granted. I am happy now with my new love and he makes me feel that I am important to him. He makes me feel that I can also be a priority and not just an option."

"I know you are happy and I can see that. I'm sorry. I was just too confident that you love me so much, you wouldn't look for someone new. Well, at least I know now and everything seems clear to me." McVee was teary-eyed but he never felt more at ease with McSt.

"This time, I want to make the right decision of loving someone who loves me more than I love him. I may not love him as much as I love you but I can always give this one a chance. I think I deserve to feel that I am special and I did not feel that with you. I know though that you did not deserve what I did last Saturday and I would like to apologize for that."

At the back of McVee's mind, he was sure that McSt was determined to standby on this decision. Mcvee was just regretful that he took McSt for granted but he took this as a lesson very well learned.

We should not be too confident when someone tells us that he loves us. The real question is "until when?" because frankly, just like seasons, people change so do feelings.

Just when McVee thought it was all over, the moment McVee arrived home, McSt sent a message that said, "I miss you and I don't know if I made the right decision."



*Thanks to Erika Pilangga for the second to the last paragraph. While writing this post, she sent me that message which I thought was very appropriate as a parting paragraph.


Staying away from potentially sticky situations....

Posted on Thursday, June 24, 2010 | 0 comments

I don't know what crossed my mind when I panicked after seeing his comment on one of our friends pictures. It was not something worth panicking. But yah... I still panicked. It was the urge that I wanted to talk to him that made me send a message on Facebook and on Yahoo Messenger. I wanted to talk to McA because I wanted to catch up on what is happening with his life. However, he did not reply to any of my messages. My initial reaction was to browse and choose among my 1,000++ friends on Facebook and pick the best-person-to-talk-to-in-times-of-distress.

Then I picked Angie. I picked her because I knew she'd reply right away knowing her reputation as a certified netizen even at the workplace. I wanted to talk to her because the whole situtation was new to her which eliminates all sources of bias. Her suggestion was to let McA know that I miss him so much and if that sounds very uncomfortable then I can tell it to him in Cebuano. (Which by the way was more dyahe!). I cannot imagine myself telling McA, "Gimingaw kaayo ko nimo Bay." Hence, I wanted to hear another opinion.

I finally clicked on JM's name after not talking to her for the longest time. After narrating to her everything that I'm going through at the moment, she said "Noooooo don't fall! hehehe hold on! Stay away from potentially sticky situations.. kanang mga walay klaro, walay angay. Yeah.. and if it's too hard, sometimes distance helps.. not forever, but for a while.. until you can be his friend, just his friend.."

Basically, I got over it. I was over the idea that McA and me will ever be boyfriends again. We were meant to be friends and we function well when we stay in that circle. I was just surprised at how easily I got over the idea. Prior to that realization, I thought I'm gonna be in deep shit. But then, I felt better and I totally understood JM's point.

I then talked to Darcy with a happy heart. Since she has her own issues too, I allowed her to do the talking and I felt a lot better knowing that amidst my own drama, I can still afford to listen to other people's problems.

Indeed, some moments require friends insights because there are things that you don't see because you are just too blinded. In some cases, we refuse to see.

Please Inspire Me!!!!

Posted on Wednesday, June 23, 2010 | 2 comments

I can't seem to find a good inspiration to post something for Fashion Profiles right now. I feel that I need to work on so many things to make it very original as possible. I consider FaPr my baby and I am very willing to work for its growth. But something is just so not right about my attitude these past few days. I feel like I'm such an airhead and that I seem too overconfident which lead to the loss of McS.

But this is not all about McS because he was nothing. I mean at some point in my life he was, but he blew the chance. So I'm giving myself a treat and will love myself more.

Going back to FaPr.... It is still not working... And I am here trying to find all the right kinds of motivation... Been sucking GG (Gossip Girl) all up... and like I said... It is not helpful.

Well right now... I need divine intervention because I so wanna be the first someone someone in this big hospital... I don't even know what I'll do there but I am so willing to take the job and conquer this something something world. I am just hoping that the people who endorsed me to their unit head has the approval and has considered me an option for the position. I will promise to stay humble albeit proud. I don't know how to do that but please... I just wanna hear what they have to say... Instead of just waiting here.... In the middle of the night, filled with uncertainty....

OK... I think I just need to take some rest because lack of sleep makes a person fat and that could be the reason why I've gained much weight... I can't blame lack of sleep alone... I need to work on healthy-eating too... It has been an endless struggle and I have not gone out of it triumphant...

One major accomplishment for today... I took baby steps to do my laundry... And I just learned that the best way to do it is hand wash.... If all else fails... I can raid the washing machine or better yet... that manang who bugs me on my laundry because its extra income for her... HAHAHA! =)

Makin It So Difficult For McV

Posted on Monday, June 21, 2010 | 0 comments

McV cannot decipher why McA can't even make a wall post on his Facebook Wall. McV then thought that McA is not proud of him as a friend. That McV will never be good enough to be someone McA can be very proud of. That McA cannot just post something on McV's wall because other people might think that McA is gay. Maybe this is just McV's paranoia because he saw McA's post on his friends wall.

But for now, McV is OK with it. He can still live with it. He wants to focus on the people who love him back because he learned that he should only love the people who can love him back. McV just needs assurance and is sad because he is not getting any. Well, my question to McV is... "Do you really need a wall post from McA?" And McV knows the answer... but is not satisfied...

V --- Caught Off-guard!!!

Posted on Sunday, June 20, 2010 | 0 comments

Issues have sprouted out of nowhere. Suddenly, someone was caught off guard with the introduction of a new love. At some point, he thought S will be there the whole time.

V opted to attend the office reunion at some drinking place near ABS-CBN. It was meant to be a feast among friends who wanted to meet-up to at least update each other on each other's lives. But unfortunately, it ended so badly.

V and S have been going out for some time. From steady to rocky then steady and back to being rocky again. All the while V thought that S will be there. That S was happy with their rendezvous. However, S brought a date with him and left V in a very pathetic and loser moment. S had a new guy while V was stuck with himself and some friends who gave a frienly tap on his back but still couldn't fill up the emptiness. V went to a loyal friends place after the drinking that night. Indeed, it was a crying moment but it opened V's eyes that he's not the only one for S. That S is capable of breaking his heart. Because all through out.... V was confident that S will always be there.

Getting into the FIFA Craze!!!!

Posted on Saturday, June 12, 2010 | 0 comments

Among all sporting events, I think FIFA World Cup is one of the most interesting. In fact, it is more popular than NBA!!! A good number of fans all over the world make sure that they get to catch the football matches. I'm sure my used-to-be SS (Special Someone) is going gaga this season...

Since I can't go to South Africa and watch it live.... I'll try to be the best fan in my own country by joining the FIFA Club Online. I fell in love with football in high school because it was the only sport that made me run and made me feel good about myself.... I super find it empowering... WOHOOO!!!! =)

So my favorite player is Cristiano Ronaldo because aside from the fact that he is one of the hottest players existing today --- after David Beckham intentionally lessened his hotness level to save his relationship with Viktoria... =) (Those were my own thoughts! HAHAHA!!!)

VIVA PORTUGAL!!!! =) I support you all the way!!!! =)

Silliman University P.E. Paddling Class in the 1960's

Posted on Monday, June 7, 2010 | 0 comments


Wow!!! Did you even think that a paddling class was possible?

All I did for my Physical Education classes back in college was dance --- social dance, modern dance, square dance, etc. If there was a paddling class in our time, I'd be more than happy to join them. Don't you just love the clear waters and the sun ( with sunblock of course or else you're committing suicide...)

I was just amazed... I wanna live in the 60's... I think that was the classiest decade.... Very Vintage!!!! ♥

The Baguio Invitation

Posted on | 0 comments
Oh my gosh!!!! A friend called earlier and her family is asking me to join them in their Baguio escapade this coming Thursday... Of course I wanna go... Although I know that this isn't the perfect time since the weather is a bit whacked and we should've gone there when the temperature here in Manila was at its highest... Right?

But this trip is not all about me... This about my friend's sister who is going to college and would just like to unwind before the semester starts.

Initially, they planned for a Subic overnight but then since they have a rest house in Baguio then everyone suggested that we can sleep in Baguio then.

I haven't asked permission though but I think I'm not telling my folks about it. They will just see my pictures. But since I have always believed that I am a good son, I'll keep my folks worry-free... I will tell them about it.... Keeping my anxiety level at its lowest... =)

My Facebook Experiment

Posted on | 0 comments
If I go online right now, who among my 1,726 friends will chat with me on Facebook? This is my little experiment and I am so excited!!!! =)

Among the 105 friends who were online earlier, only two friends sent me a message. Only two friends needed to chat with me... =)

  • GJ (who has done a pretty good job in the moving-on plane!!! prouda u sistah!!!) I am her small sister.... And honestly, I think her next boyfriend will be the luckiest... I can attest to that... That asshole who broke her heart was WORTHLESS!!!! My sistah... deserves someone better... =) And I think she's coping at the moment... Finding her right to smile again.... =)


  • Philip (who has never moved-on from the past and still asked me about Matth)... =) The sweetest thing he told me was that he missed chit-chatting with me in our room. Oh! I haven't told you that we were roommates(Room 213) in my 2nd year at Silliman University. His task was to make sure that we were well-fed. He combines pancit canton, canned tuna, and mayo in a heater and yah... it tastes good... but you can just think of the smell!!!


Overall.... I think I had meaningful conversations with them earlier... I love sharing my thoughts with them... At some point, I also learn from that they tell me.... Loved the way we had to catch-up.... =) Thanks Guys for the time.... =) Totally appreciate every single minute of it.... And now is the right time to hit the sack... Ciao! ♥

S.O.S. A friend is falling for a taken guy....

Posted on Saturday, June 5, 2010 | 0 comments

HELP!!! My friend is "falling for a taken guy and they have something undefined" and I was trying to impose my tough love on her.

Until now, I still don't know why some people like the idea of getting into something that has always been known as complicated. Feel free to read our chat script and if you have your own views, please feel free to comment.

Friend: i think i'm falling for a taken guy

Me: OH MY GOSH!!!!

Friend: and we have something undefined... huhu

Me:you are? uhmmm.... by now....

Friend: undefined, mieL

Me: if you think u have the right to ask what you and this guy is going through... then i think it would be better to ask him... gosh.... undefined is same as its comlicated right?

Friend: yeah... same ra jud, mieL... ahays... i asked him man

Me:and then?

Friend: i asked man gud if i'm his the other... he didn't answer... ana xa nga di daw ko dapat magthink ana... basta daw i'm his taba (taba nako)... ky i call him tikig nako man... ... tsk :(:( ahays, mieL

Me: LOL... miel...

Friend: nakoncenxa au ko sa iyang gf

Me: are u enjoying it? maka-konsensya man jud na miel... :):)

Friend: yeah... kaayo... i spent my June 2 with him... before i left for iloilo

Me: but then... does he even have plans of breaking up with the legal gf?

Friend: i dunno, mieL... hmmmm... he does not talk about her... everytime mag-ask ko ky e-change topic niya

Me: see....

Friend: like example.. manganchaw ko niya about his gf muana ko nga "uuuyyyy"... muana na xa nga "uuuy ka diha"... huhu...tapos ana xa na kita mi sembreak... ahays

Me:they dont wanna talk about their legal wives.... coz they are so guilty... and its like brushing it up on them... that they are completely doing something bad

Friend: lagi jud, mieL!!!! huhuhu... makalagot.... huhuhu... pero, mieL... di ko gusto maging reason why magbulag sila if ever... huhuhu

Me: you are taking part into something that is not right...hahaha! the righteous me... :):) dont mind me miel... im just trying to think objectively...

Friend: hehehe

Me:u just put yourself into the legal gf's shoes... and u just examine how ud feel about it...

Friend:lagi, mieL, wui... lagi, mieL, wui... huhu...

Me: but u have to keep your heart guarded...please....

Friend: huhu..mieL..

Me: yes?

Friend: kabalo man ko how it feels sa side sa iyang legal wife... mao gani koncenxa au ko... as in kaaaaaaaaayo

Me: see.... so as much as possible....

Friend:ky i've been there...tsk...ma and pa pa jud ilang tawagan...huhu...ouch...i was there when his legal wife called..tsk...na-hurt ko...

Me: stop communicating with this guy... LOL... easier said than done... right?

Friend:after the call ky he hugged me...yeah.. it;s hard, mieL...kanina nag-grocery ko.. all i can think of is him...

Me:wah!!!!

Friend:huhu...

Me:thats not love honey... :):) hahaha! miel...this wont work.. coz it started with the wrong foot... dapat... if u flirt with him... he has no gf na... he doesnt even show signs that he's going to break up with the girl... so what kind of assurance will u get from him?

Friend: gani...not a sign, mieL...ahays... i dunno, mieL :(:( hmmmmm...basta i like him...he was the first to flirt with me...wa ra man to nako...

Me:im deemed to be older... i should know better... HAHAHA! RIGHTEOUS... for the nth time... =)=) HAHAHA!

Friend: then a friend told me na feeling niya this guy likes me... hmmmm...

Me:and u liked the feeling of being wanted...right?

Friend: yeah

Me: maybe ur just loving the attention miel?

Friend:ahays... know what, mieL

Me:what is it? :):)

Friend: nagtxt iyang cousin sa iya.. kabsa ko sa txt.. nag-ask iyang cousin if when daw sila magpakasal sa iya legal wife...nagreply xa na wala daw na sa plano

Me:okey....

Friend:then hours after.. gihatod nako niya sa pier.. then i forgot ngano niabot ana nga point.. but i asked him if when sila pakasal... ana xa nga wa jud daw na sa iyang plano...then ana ko niya na "i hope i'll be there. if i get invited

Me:then whats his point of being in that relationship?

Friend: then he squeezed my hand...ky nag-hold hands man mi ato...huhu

Me: u are subjecting yourself to such pain....gosh!!!!

Friend: ahays

Me: im gonna do tough love on you miel ha...get over it....

Friend: he knows man guro, mieL, na ma-hurt ko everytime talk mi about it

Me: he's not the guy for you...if u want him....

Friend: lagi, mieL.... he's not jud... but he's just so amazing...and that he just fits the guy that i want.... hmmmmmmmmm....:(:(

Me: but if u really want this guy... stop asking about him and the girl...

Friend: last wednesday, mieL..naa ko ship...on my way here sa iloilo...grabeh nakong hilak... ky i miss him much na....as in hilak na todo jud.. ga-tulo2x akong luha.. but i had to be quiet ky daghan pasahero

Me: tsk miel... stop hurting yourself OK? u deserve to be happy....

Friend: thanks, mieL

Me: and there are lots of fishes in the sea....

Friend: i know i deserve to be happy jud

Me: i wish ud listen.... but just do what u think is bearable...
.
Friend: but i'm happy when i'm with him jud.... ahays, mieL... daghan na nag-ingon nako to stop this... pati si **********...he knos man...knows

Me: see...

Friend: :(:(

Me: so id wish ud stop...

Friend: mieL

Me: :):)

Friend: huhu

Me: coz its not doing u any good... at all...

Friend: ambot ngano niabot ko ani na situation

Me: ok?

Friend: tskyeah.. i know, mieL... it's super not :(:( huhu

Me: please.

Friend: thanks for being honest, mieL...ahays... pero sometimes.. we tend to be crazy.. and fall for the wrong one

Me: i will tell you things that will hurt u... but in the end... it will always be you who will make the decision... i think iv said my part....

Friend: yeah.. thanks au, mieL... it hurts jud coz it's from you... coz i know true friends like you will tell me the truth... ahays... the sad truth

Me: yes....

Friend: cge lang.. i'll be busy na starting this monday... basin maka-get over ra ko

Me: yes.... miel... being busy beats the heart....anyway.... i have to go.... :):) miel...u take care... and have fun OK? =)=) dont think too much of that guy... and if ever? HAPPY THOUGHTS!!!

Friend: i love you, mieL... always and forvver... forever... i hope to see yah soonest!!!!! thanks gid

Me: yes yes...:):)

Friend: i'll try jud to forget him

Me: dont worry....

Friend: super thanks for the time... as in!!

Me: am here for you....bye...


When we give our advise, we need to be realistic... We have to consider that there are so many things that are easier said than done. These people asking for an advise before asking other, they already have their own decision and whatever you tell them will matter less.

In the end, what makes them happy will always lead the way and it will remain their decision to follow their hearts desire or not... ♥

Chand is coming home....

Posted on | 0 comments

Oh my gosh!!! Chand sent me a message on Facebook earlier and I couldn't help but be "kilig". Don't get me wrong... I have a slight man-crush on him but he's my friend and the way I look at him will remain platonic. (Defensive!!!) He's coming back from the US and I am so excited!!!! How can you not notice my smile --- my platonic smile.

Here is our chat script on Facebook:

Chand

yo!!!!

lol

4:50pmMe

yo....

OH MY GOSH!!! =)=) How are you?

4:50pmChand

ohhh my gosh... baby let me love you down hahahahaha.....

never better vic.. how you been?

4:51pmMe

Oh oh... oh.. oh...

i was like dancing here....

:):)

all good...

4:51pmChand

lol

4:51pmMe

still happy...

and yes... gay.... HAHAHA!

4:51pmChand

good, and you dhould

you should be

4:51pmMe

when are u coming back? we should party again!!! =)=)

4:52pmChand

hell to the YEAH, we gonna party this august

!!!!!!!!!

4:52pmMe

Another OH MY GOSH!!!!

WOW!!!!

4:52pmChand

oh oh oh

founders day!!!!!!

4:53pmMe

is this your mecca?

4:53pmChand

mecca??

wa-what??

lol\

4:53pmMe

hahaha!

the founders day... is it like... you have to be there coz its like your way of remembering and renewing your vows with negros?

LOL...

4:55pmChand

hahaha.. HELL YES!! lol.. ah you crack me up.. so whats the story with manila?

4:56pmChand

silliman founders day vic!!!!!!! this august!! we party god dammit!! hahahahaha

4:57pmMe

hahaha!

i want to....

4:57pmChand

or we can keep partyin at the ice bar heheh round up the crew coz the chand-man is coming

4:57pmMe

but i have work... so i think i can party with you here in manila

4:57pmChand

hahahahahah

4:58pmMe

HAHAHA!

tha chand-man is coming....

we cant get stuck with ice

4:58pmChand

HAHAHAHA yeah boy.. no ice

??

4:58pmMe

there are hot new places in here

and it deserves our attention... HAHAHA!

but yah... ice is still good...

4:59pmChand

greatness

4:59pmMe

:):) reminiscing... HAHAHA! =)=)

4:59pmChand

yeeeaaahhh..... NOT!

hahahahah

jk

4:59pmMe

HAHAHA! :P:P

im so excited...

lemme know when ur here OK? u can do wall posts... or twitter... or private message here on facebook... anything works... :):)

5:00pmChand

sounds good brother!

i better get some shut eye.. keep u posted

5:01pmMe

and please get rid of the brother part... but we cant neglect it... we are brothers in christ...

goodnight chand.... :):)

5:01pmChand

lol... peace

night

5:01pmMe

LOL!!!!

5:01pmChand is offline.

Then he went offline. Hope to see him this August. I will be expecting for a nice dinner --- may it be in a group or not. ♥